Old Habbits Die Hard, If At All

I've been staying up late. I'm barely making it to work on time. I need three cups of coffee before I can put a check mark on a paper. What's wrong with me? My old friends are back on TV!! Damn Nick At Nite. Cosby Show, Roseannne, they suck me in...I laugh so hard, sitting alone in my apartment, checking my watch and getting reinvigorated with every episode.

I used to watch them dubbed - without understanding the cultural nuances. Now I get it all. It feels like I captured an opportunity to live through history again, without making the same mistakes and, better yet, enjoying the experience even more.

Dear TV, what did you do to me? I cannot do without you. I have no ability to separate reality from story. I empathize with the characters faster than cells have a chance to split. One bar of a jingle and I am there, in colorful la-la land. The trouble is, I do not exactly leave it when the show ends. I cannot just snap out of it and shake it out of my system. I go through the day, hoping for the moment when my life will start resembling the fascinating aspects of TV shows. If it doesn't happen today, maybe it will tomorrow. If it doesn't happen in this city, maybe it will somewhere else.

And the travel between this and that land begins. Half real, half imaginary - but overall very hopeful.